Television viewers of a certain age probably remember the opening theme to “All in the Family” in which Carroll O’Connor (Archie Bunker) and Jean Stapleton (Edith Bunker) sing the opening theme entitled “Those Were the Days.” The lyrics reminisce about their youth and early adult hood, which provided a humorous – even historic commentary on the changes in American society of the early 20th century compared with life in the 1970s.
“Those Were the Days” by Lee Adams and Charles Strouse
Boy, the way Glen Miller played. Songs that made the hit parade. Guys like us, we had it made. Those were the days. Didn’t need no welfare state. Everybody pulled his weight. Gee, our old LaSalle ran great. Those were the days. And you know who you were then, girls were girls and men were men. Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again. People seemed to be content. Fifty dollars paid the rent. Freaks were in a circus tent. Those were the days. Take a little Sunday spin, go to watch the Dodgers win. Have yourself a dandy day that cost you under a fin. Hair was short and skirts were long. Kate Smith really sold a song. I don’t know just what went wrong. Those Were The Days.
The fifth line is most telling of what I’m about to write about in this article on transphobia, “And you know who you were then, girls were girls and men were men.”
A few weeks ago, Vanity Fair unveiled a new magazine cover with Bruce Jenner now wishing to be referred to as Caitlyn Jenner. The subsequent article about Jenner’s transformation from man to woman outlines the struggles Bruce underwent for over six decades before deciding the time had come to take the steps to become the woman she always believed herself to be. Many people were accepting of the transformation while others chose to ridicule her transformation, calling her everything from a freak, to an abomination to a man playing dress-up. I quickly came to Ms. Jenner’s defense on Facebook and faced a litany of responses ranging from likes of support to she’s a freak to even one comment suggesting we shouldn’t talk about such matters publicly. That last request/statement really bothers me the most. You might be uncomfortable with the topic and if so then I suggest you not read what I’m about to say. Transgender people, much like homosexuals, have been forced to take a back seat for far too long in our so-called well-developed society. It’s time we address transphobia, recognize it for its destructiveness and try to educate people that people are still people regardless of what gender they present themselves.
I submit to you that fear of transgender people – transphobia – is another form of bigotry, very much like racism and even sexism. Transphobia is described as emotional disgust, fear, anger or discomfort felt or expressed towards people who do not conform to society’s gender expectations. Those attitudes are becoming generally unacceptable in modern society, whereas significantly more individuals still maintain transphobic views without fear of censure. I have a personal story I wish to relay to you about my experience with a transgender woman in a moment, but first a few statistics.
Harassment and violence directed towards transgender people is referred to as trans bashing and it can be verbal, physical and sexual assault. While gay bashing is often directed against a target’s real or even perceived sexual orientation, trans bashing is directed against the target’s real or perceived expressed gender identity. Trans bashing has also been applied to hate speech directed at transgender people and to depictions of transgender people in the media that reinforce negative stereotypes about them. Notable victims of violent crimes motivated by transphobia include Gwen Araujo, Angie Zapata, Nizah Morris, Lauren Harries and most famously of the movie, “Boys Don’t Cry.” – Brandon Teena.
The American Psychological Association says that transgender children are far more likely than other children to experience harassment and violence in school, foster care, residential treatment centers, homeless shelters and juvenile justice programs. Researcher contend that trans youth routinely experience taunting, teasing and bullying at school, and that nearly all trans youth say they were verbally or physically harassed in school, particularly during gym class, at school events, or when using single-sex restrooms. Three-quarters report having felt unsafe.
Switching to adults, transgender people are frequently subjected to ridicule, stares, taunting and threats of violence, even when just walking down the street or walking into a store. A U.S. survey of 402 older, employed, high-income transgender people found that 60% reported violence or harassment because of their gender identity. 56% had been harassed or verbally abused, 30% had been assaulted, 17% had had objects thrown at them, 14% had been robbed and 8% had experienced what they characterized as an unjustified arrest.
A study of 81 transgender people in Philadelphia found that 30% reported feeling unsafe in public because they were transgender, with 19% feeling uncomfortable for the same reason. When asked if they had ever been forced to have sex, experienced violence in their home, or been physically abused, the majority answered yes to each question.
A review of American studies on sexual violence towards transgender people found that around 50% of transgender people have been sexually assaulted. When transgender people are murdered, they are often shot or stabbed repeatedly, riddled with bullets or bludgeoned beyond recognition. Those are some of the major statistics to wake up your mind.
Now, long before Bruce became Caitlyn I interviewed a transgender woman on a local radio program. I read her book about her transformation, the struggles she underwent which were everything from financial woes to losing her marriage, her estranged relationship with her son when she came and finally acceptance from some of the most important people in her life. Because of timing and scheduling issues I had to record the interview in advance. I finally found an open spot one morning and handed the interview (it was on a mini-disc) to the board operator. He started it while I worked on paperwork in my office. During the course of the interview and playback, I heard the board operator laughing and ridiculing the woman I had talked to. I felt anger, confusion and bewilderment over the bigotry, ignorance this board operator displayed and most of all – flat out rudeness. I came to realize how sexist and demeaning he could be. Whenever I had an attractive woman as a guest on the morning show, he and a buddy of his would make lewd, obscene gestures behind their backs. Very juvenile behavior.
So now when I see memes degrading Caitlyn, or people still insisting on calling her Bruce I think of my guest from nearly a decade ago. Sure there will be some slip ups of pronouns, it will take time to always remember to say Caitlyn. But when it’s done out of mean-spiritedness or to degrade Caitlyn and the struggle she went through – well, that’s unacceptable.
There are a wide number of theories as to what causes transgender people to identify with the opposite gender of the biological genitalia. The theory I accept as to what initially creates transgender people is that during the development process the link between the body and brain goes awry. The brain is developed one way (either male or female) and the body another (either male or female). In other words, the paths cross, say a female brain and a male body, then comes the possibility of future conflict.
If we are to be a multi-cultural, melting pot society, we have to do more than just accept other races, religions and ideals in our midst – we also have to be more open-minded to the fact that men aren’t always men and that women aren’t always women. The body and mind can get scrambled for whatever reason. When that happens it doesn’t give us the right to belittle others or condemn them simply because that’s the easy path to take. Transgender people tend to be more in tuned with their world than anyone else. I mean, to say to society, “Yeah, I have a man’s body but I have a woman’s mind and wish to live the rest of my life as a woman.” That takes a lot more guts than I’ll ever have. I admire that kind of courage. As for Archie and Edith, Those Were the Days should remain just that…. Those Were the Days.”
Joe Haffner
June 24, 2015
Joe's Random Thoughts! 